8 Things You Can Do If You're Always Feeling Lonely
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Whether we admit it or not, the fact is that almost all of
us have felt lonely at some point in time. Yes, loneliness is real, and it can
affect people a lot. If you think about it, there may have been a time when you
felt no real connection with the outside world, nothing really seemed to
interest you, and boredom became the order of the day. At that point, you may
have felt lonely. Quite a lot of people may feel lonely, so if you're
experiencing loneliness at the moment, know that you're not the only one. In
fact, according to a Statista
survey, approximately 33% of adults worldwide are lonely.
The main reason why some people may get lonely is a lack of
a social life. People may get so engulfed in their careers and the like at the
detriment of their social lives. In most cases, this may lead to loneliness.
The reasons why people have poor social lives can include low self-esteem,
introversion, and even depression in some instances. All these can be tagged as
causes of loneliness as well. One can also get lonely after a romantic breakup
or divorce, among other things.
As much as being lonely can be so painful, it's not all
as bad as some people may want to make you believe. There are some advantages
to being lonely. Improved productivity is a good example of loneliness as a
benefit. And that's because you get fewer distractions when alone, which means
you can focus more on projects and increase your productivity.
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Here are eight things you can do if you're always feeling
lonely:
1. Go out and connect with people in the real world.
As much as one can still feel lonely even in the midst of a
crowd, a good way to fight loneliness or boredom is to go out and connect with
people or people watch in safe places. Visually observe any positive and
encouraging connections you see others make between themselves with their shared
interests or passions. This can inspire good feelings inside of you, but most
importantly, you must learn to connect to a meaningful place within yourself
when not around others. If you are going out to connect with people in an
attempt to fight loneliness, it should be people of like minds. If you must
deal with and overcome loneliness, quit locking yourself up in the room all day
and night and doing nothing, but gloating. One thing is, we're all
interconnected with one another as far as the world is concerned, so there's
actually no point in avoiding people. It’s important to interact with others in
ways that open the door for genuine and meaningful connections. An occasional alternative
to meeting in person with family, friends, and others is to throw a weekend Zoom
video conferencing “party” where everyone who attends meets on Zoom as a group
and shares how their week went, what their plans are or were, and laugh about
enjoyable memories.
2. Engage in meditation or prayer.
One of the most effective ways to deal with and overcome
loneliness is no doubt through prayer to one’s higher power or by engaging in
meditation. You can set aside a few minutes every day to pray or meditate. No
matter how unpleasant it seems if you pray and mediate and do not hear a real
voice on the other end of your prayer or meditation, embrace the thought of
having your Higher Power’s undivided attention and have faith that you are not
spiritually alone.
3. Practice gratitude.
Most often than not, you tend to feel lonely by thinking
life isn't kind to you as it should be. It's okay to think that way just not
all the time. A lot of people may feel slighted by what seems like life’s
anti-social personality. But then, if you critically look around you, there are
lots of beautiful things you should be grateful for when you are alone and have
time to yourself. If you must win the war against loneliness and fight boredom,
you must learn to practice gratitude. Be grateful for things you're blessed
with instead of lamenting over those you might not actually need in the real
sense of the word. A simple way to do this is to make a list of things that
make you feel good about yourself. Make a list of good memories. It can be a
place you travel to or travel with a loved one. It could be a goal you
accomplished in the past. Just anything that makes you feel positively alive or
excited about your life.
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4. Get yourself a pet.
Experts have stated that owning a pet or even just playing
with animals is a good way to fight the feeling of loneliness. As revealed by
research, the presence of a living creature near you can help with relieving
stress and boosting your mood and wellness.
5. Learn to be content in your own company.
Learning to be content in your own company can mean embracing
internal peace while alone and not depending on the presence or absence of
others to make you feel relevant or irrelevant. This is because learning to be
content in your own company can enable you to connect with yourself and/or nature, which
has a way of boosting or soothing your mood, and the figurative sound of
silence that can bring peace after a stressful and chaotic day. Whether you
choose to sit alone in your room and read a book while your family is
downstairs or no one else is home, go alone and see the flower gardens, or
visit your favorite parks, lakes, rivers, and mountains near you, it can be a
new and fulfilling experience to conquer the challenge of always feeling like
you must have others around to be happy and fulfilled.
6. Take a break from social media.
While you can connect with anyone across the globe today in
a jiffy on the different social media platforms, that's no real connection.
Social media has no doubt robbed us of human-to-human connection. One of the
surest ways to deal with and overcome loneliness is to take a break from social
media. This may push you to connect with real people offline and overcome your
lack of a social life.
7. Engage in things you're passionate about.
When you feel no real connection with the outside world and
loneliness sets in, do not fret. One of the best ways to deal with and overcome
loneliness is by doing the things you're passionate about whether it’s
crocheting a blanket or building a backyard deck. It's true that you can
experience boredom to the extent that even things you enjoy doing might not
appeal to you anymore. But, you can push yourself to engage in new hobbies you
may become passionate about.
8. Seek the help of a professional.
If you have tried out some or all the above-outlined points
and it's not working, perhaps you should seek the help of a professional. Don't
try too hard to have it all figured out by yourself. Professionals exist for a
reason. And, that's to help you in such a time as this. Consider talking with a
professional. A professional can help you to identify the root cause of your loneliness
and devise ways to deal with and overcome it.
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The good news is that sometimes, you do need to spend a
dime to speak with a professional. There is quite a bit of support hotlines for
loneliness, depression, and isolation that have certified counselors who are
devoted to seeing you deal with loneliness, for free, and can make referrals to
community agencies in your city. Consider getting in touch with them.
References:
https://psychiatry.uchicago.edu/news/17-easy-things-do-when-youre-feeling-lonely
https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/eight_ways_to_ease_the_pain_of_loneliness
https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/how-to-not-feel-lonely
https://www.betterup.com/blog/feeling-alone