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  3. 10 Awesome Ways To Deal With People Who Use Humor To Harm Others

10 Awesome Ways To Deal With People Who Use Humor To Harm Others

Image Source: Pixabay


Everyone wasn’t born to be a comedian and you may have witnessed or experienced a time in your life when a questionable or cruel joke disguised as innocent humor cut like a knife. 

 

Regardless of whatever cadre of society you come from, you may have witnessed or experienced at least two instances where someone told a joke that had you asking "Really???" Whether it was in a classroom, with a group of friends, or from a lousy stand-up comedian you paid quite a lot to see, the hang still remains that such a joke was made with the intention to make another individual appear weaker and most importantly, a very terrible joke.

 

However, if you claim to have the most modest group of people around you, surely you may have watched incidents between others where a joking crack led to an entirely different tale. If you’ve ever been faced with a questionable joke or not, you probably do not ever want to be left wondering how to best handle the situation.  


So, here are 10 Awesome Ways To Deal With People Who Use Humor To Harm Others:

 

• Stay Calm  

 

In order not to have yourself pictured as the “bad guy” (or gal), try as much as possible to keep your nerves under control. Whether such a joke was made targeting you, or someone else, just breathe in and out for a bit, calculate the possible damage to come from what you are about to do or say, and re-think any urges to commit physical violence. When you are calm, the most reasonable side of yourself is in play, hence avoiding any possible rash reactions. 

 

Image Source: Pixabay


• Don’t Laugh

 

Keeping a straight face and not laughing at a joke may be interpreted in two possible ways. Either it wasn't funny, or it simply can never be funny. When you do not laugh at a toxic or offensive joke, it can show that you have no interest in such humor. Nip such jokes in the bud by maintaining eye contact with the “comedian” to show you are serious. This can also throw them off their game, so later on, you may end up getting the last laugh from there.

 

• Ask Them To Explain The Joke

 

This move is best AFTER you are calm. Sometimes, the unwholesome joke teller may not even be aware that whatever he or she said might have such negative effects, until they are asked to explain what they said. A simple "...And what did you mean by that?" or “I don’t get it.” may go a long way in opening the joker's mind to the harm done. However, remember to remain calm, because on occasions whereby such an individual is aware of the horrid nature of their joke, the explanation might come with a little bit of awareness or feelings of aggravation on their part even if you have no malicious intentions against them.

 

• Respectfully Communicate That The Joke Is Offensive

 

It is important to let an individual know such a matter is not meant for laughing purposes for you. Most times, these jokes aim at sensitive topics, such as race, religion, or sex, which can make people very uncomfortable, and angry. So, rather than putting up a display of rage, quietly wait till it is over, and RESPECTFULLY explain why you don't like such a joke. That kind of motive will sell you as a much more sensible individual.


Image Source: Pixabay

 

• Be Clear About What You Do And Don’t Find Funny

 

This is a long-term solution, as everyone around you can become aware of topics you don't relate to in a humorous manner. Different people come with absolutely different senses of humor. While you might prefer mild jokes, others around you might like the darker side. So, it is best you let your sensitive areas be known. Unbeknownst to others, you may have faced a form of grief earlier, or have certain discussions that have you on edge. It’s okay to let people know about such things, without going into great detail rather than just laugh at a joke even while it hurts to make someone else feel good. Your feelings do matter. Forget about being tagged "selfish" or “uptight”.

 

• Don’t Fall For The Gaslight Of Being Too Sensitive

 

"You’re no fun."…"Isn't it just a joke?"…"You’re too serious. Relax."...You're personalizing things." These may be some of the comments you might get when you make topics known that you don't find comfortable. Regardless, such comments aren't worth changing your perspective towards anything.


Having joking fun isn't all about what makes other people happy. It’s also about what makes you laugh or happy. So, if you’re tagged a wet blanket because you don't laugh at sexist or racially-related jokes, then feel free to remain as wet as you can.


Image Source: Pixabay

 

• Don’t Deny Yourself A Good Laugh From A Proper Joke

 

No matter how conservative you may or may not be, don't hinder an opportunity to laugh when a joke is good and funny. It doesn't mean you are weak; it just shows that you know quality comedy. Even if a sensitive joke has just been told, let the good ones that come after get at least a chuckle. Because c'mon, all jokes may not leave you sober.

 

• Be Willing To Let The Joke Slide

 

Yeah, it sounds absurd, but you can simply just let it go if you choose. You may believe that the joke is borderline offensive, but not so egregious that it warrants your time and energy. You may believe that if malicious intent is involved on the part of the joke teller, then justice will surely be served eventually, and that's how life is. Fate may have it that the joke may end up on them.

 

• Walk Away

 

"He who walks away from a bad joke will live to fight another day." It may not be the best time for such a confrontation, so you may decide to just back up and walk off. This may not mean that the battle against foul jokes is over. You still may decide to address the offensive jokester at a more appropriate time.

 

• Give Them A Taste Of Their Own Medicine

 

After walking away, the time to address the joke teller may eventually arise. This may be the last straw. Some people can be quite stubborn, ignorant, and callous in refusing to take a hint that their jokes are unwelcome, and you just may have to strike back to make a statement. So, you may consider if being equally rash towards them may help them get the picture, and let them know how it feels to be in that kind of situation. However, if it comes down to this, you may wish to re-evaluate your dealings with them altogether.


Image Source: Pixabay


Image Source: Pixabay

 

In conclusion, telling jokes isn’t the only way to make people laugh. Be aware of people’s conversations and reactions to see what makes them smile, sad, or angry and you can get a good idea of whether or how you should joke with them or not. Remember not to hurt people's feelings or directly make a personal attack against others with jokes to feel validated or accepted by others. Work on being a considerate and aware individual and share this article if you enjoyed it.

 

References

 

https://smallbusiness.chron.com/deal-inappropriate-jokes-work-18007.html

 

https://www.helpguide.org/articles/relationships-communication/managing-conflicts-with-humor.htm


https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.dpcedcenter.org/wp-content/uploads/2018/10/201810_handout.pdf&ved=2ahUKEwiMuuKOr__9AhXC_7sIHf8mAO0QFnoECC0QAQ&usg=AOvVaw29YmNg6qpBqRY60ZmxvlMJ

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